Pregnant with a toddler

When I found out I was pregnant for the second time I was pleasantly not surprised. I knew it. There were a few doubts in my mind but in that deep down uterus I knew implantation was going on. My first sign of it? My second last day at my job I was deathly ill to the point where I literally told my co workers I wasn't doing shit that day. I also remember them trying to require me and they did not give two fucks that I thought I was about to die.. Assholes

Fast forward to the pregnancy...in the beginning I felt like I knew I was in for a different pregnancy than the first, right again. I felt nauseous but never puked and the summer heat was dreadful. Another aspect to this pregnancy was that this time I had a toddler which made it 10x more challenging because on the regular I had to push through for her no matter how hot,tired or lazy I felt. She needed to be in constant motion because that's what her life needed. I remember many fun trips to the splash pad and park,grandma and grandpa's pool and many walks that got shorter and shorter ad the pregnancy went on 

The third trimester was by far the hardest as the pounds set in and Noah decided to make a new home on my sciatic nerve. At this point being pregnant with a toddler was an everyday battle between feeling like the worst mom in the world and trying my hardest to be as active as I could for my daughter. I feel as if I was pretty successful but I noticed myself complaining more and more about the pain, the breathlessness and the exhaustion. I was ready for him to be here and I still had a good month Left 

Luckily for me my daughter is incredibly smart and when I tell her I am soreahe understands and so when I tell her I can't hold her for long or sit on the hard floor and would say "mommys sore?"" Yes mommy is sore" "OK"

Then the pregnancy hormones kick in and I find myself contemplating what kind of mother I am going to be,how I am going to keep the m!significant bond that my daughter and I have and more importantly how the fuck do you take care of a newborn and a toddler when both of them will want the boob all day long?! I was losing my mind with my own thoughts and worries. 

I also was pressured by the docs at the end to makd a decision about being induced, what day I wanted it to be since my due date was Christmas this that and the third. All I knew was I didn't want to be induced and I didn't want to have another c section unless medically necessary.  

Then I noticed my water broke on Sunday December 28th,2015 and my doctor sent me in to the hospital where it was confirmed to be amniotic fluid.......